Thursday, September 27, 2007


i mean, here are my up-to-the-minute observations on the season premiere of the office. i'm basically the sports guy. only not a guy. and not with sports.

PAM IS SO PRETTY! soooooo pretty.

good friends again? WTF.

hahahaha, i love kevin. love him. "pam and jim are TOTALLY hooking up."

oscar. "they've been in remarkably good moods. could be other things."

i have a sweater JUST like pam's. i swear.

HAHAHAHA making angela feel guilty about party planning! yes!

"i'm still the big dog in a... fairly... large pond."

"like pb and j. pam beasley and jim. what a waste. what. a. waste."

um. pam and jim are SO TOTALLY SNEAKING AROUND. i knew it, and you know how i knew? because pam is pretty.

THE TV CREW is confronting them. I LOVE THAT. as if pam's hair weren't proof enough. awww, and they are cute!

dangling participle? is that what they're calling it these days?

haha, i really want to see jan and pam fight. over michael.

dwight has a really great run. really great.

"you don't know me. you've just seen my penis." money to whoever can use that in context.

okay, awesome. i forgot how addicted i am to TV.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007


okay, it's hard for me to be objective about small children - but this is adorable.

first of all, these parents are using good pedagogy because she's obviously using physical cues to remember. second of all - surely? surely? i love it. i know it's a coincidence, but i want to pray that. surely? SURELY? are you SURE? yes.

don't watch any of the other children reading bible verses, though. wooooosh. here's me being judgy, but do NOT have your child do "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" as a cute youtube memory verse. i will suspect you of having serious issues.

Thursday, September 20, 2007


one of my coworkers made fun of me today for leaving a computer that was signed on to everything - "you're, like, way signed on. i'm in your email... your gradebook... your blog..."

which was false.

this is the real me.

guys, i'm having some serious trouble with the whole "never acknowledge another person's presence in any way" rule on the el. the other day, i offered my seat to a lady who, while not very old, had some gray hair. i'm just saying. anyway, i said something like, "i'm not offering you this seat because you're old! it's just that you're older than i am." but then she didn't hear me, and i had to repeat it twice. it was much less funny the third time. she was pretty awkwarded out, to be honest, and the 2,000 people squished around us just pretended they weren't listening. as usual.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

sweet home

conversation between two loud twentysomething women on the el today. ready go.

1: [getting on the train] so she was tooootally macking on this guy at the bar! and i walked by and called her a hooker, and she was like, so that's why you never called me back!
1: i mean, i guess he's 26. and maybe that's what we did when we were 26. but i think, as you get older, and relationships mature... like, whenever a guy i was dating did something mean or whatever, i told ALL my friends.
2: they say you should never tell your parents if a guy is a jerk or whatever.
1: right, because then you're like, oh, i like him again and they're like, why. he's a dick.
1: but then i think about it, and I'M kind of a dick.
2: i mean, right. i'm no great shakes.
1: it's like, i need my alone time too...

so today, i did something i haven't done since first grade - missed my stop on the bus. [this time, my mom wasn't there to run after the school bus. i have a very clear memory of looking out the back window at my mom running down the street after us.] i'm riding, and there's the tribune building, and the building from the allstate commercial, and we're on michigan, and then the driver goes, "end of the line, ma'am" and i was like, what? where was lake and state? and he very nicely directed me to the bus going in the other direction.

[i've told this story a few times, and every time i've started it with, "so you know how i always talk to strangers?"] the second bus driver, when i told him my story, very nicely asked which stop i had missed. i said, you know, state and lake. [see the picture. embarrased to have missed it, right?]

and then HE said that the bus doesn't GO that way on the way back. soutbound on state, northbound on michigan. or whatever. i didn't really get it. [kind of like every single other time someone tries to tell me where something is in chicago.] but the point is, i didn't miss the stop. the DRIVER missed the stop.

so there?

and there you go. adventures in the big city.