Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Dating without judging?

I was struck by this comment on today's Harpyness post "Huh, So You're Gay Again?"
I feel like anyone who questions someone else’s sexuality just needs a big cool glass of mind your own beeswax. No one but you needs to “understand” who or why you date. Blah, the judginess of the world is getting on my last nerve this week.
I think because I read Jezebel's pro/con on More to Love, including this comment.
My bf always tells me that guys are just lying when they say they don't like bigger girls. They don't want to be "that guy" in their group of friends and be made fun of for not only being into skinny girls. He used to be that guy when he was younger, but now he just tells them that they don't know what they're missing.
Maybe the judginess of the world is also getting on my last nerve this week. Maybe I'm reading too many blogs. And definitely, that thing that happens to me whereby everything I hear seems to surround the same topic. ("Whereby"? Did that work?) But yes, let's allow people to date whomever they'd like to date. And let's NOT have a show about fat girls who, clearly, are all desperate to date - so it's a good thing they found the one guy who thinks they're attractive. Grrrr. (Also, "real women" is derogatory. There are lots of different ways to be a woman. Or a human being.)

Also, I need a tag for my hatred of Mr. Darcy.

If you like him, read this comic. If you hate him, read this one.

[FORMAL BLOG CORRECTION: I got too excited and am embarrassed to admit that the second comic is not, in fact, about Mr. Darcy at all. UNLESS THERE IS A HIDDEN MR. DARCY SUBTEXT. And I think there may be. Betsy would also like me to add that the Bronte sisters hated Jane Austen, or something? Whatever.]


  1. "She ruffles her reader by nothing vehement, disturbs him by nothing profound; the Passions are perfectly unknown to her."

    --Charlotte Bronte on Jane Austen

    One can only assume that "the Passions" of which Charlotte has such profound knowledge consist of a peculiar type of sexism and misogyny that involves one of her heroes lying to her heroine for YEARS about his WIFE WHO HE KEEPS IN THE ATTIC while often treating said heroine cruelly (and don't get me STARTED on his treatment of his wife), and not allowing them to marry until said hero has become LITERALLY CRIPPLED AND BLIND so as to put them on equal footing. Because the heroine is, gasp, plain-looking.

    What I'm saying is, I AGREE with that comic. And so would Jane.

  2. First, I love the tag "how i hate mr. darcy." I could not agree more (I reread Pride and Prejudice in Peace Corps and kept throwing the book in disgust...anyways...)
    second, i support this move to Capitalization. lead us out of the wilderness, frb.