i mean, literally.

jimmy john's guy: what's your name?

b: b. do you need my last name?

jjg: no, you're cool. it would be too personal. i just can't handle it.

so, today, i rode megabus. i had my computer in its case in my lap, i had my ipod on, and i had my eyes closed because i was trying to sleep. the lady next to me, however, TAPPED ME ON THE SHOULDER to start talking to me.

lntm: is that an apple computer?

b: yeah, it's really great.

lntm: [nods knowingly] do you like it?

b: yes, i love it.

lntm: oooh, but is it one of the really expensive ones?

b: no, the cheapest one they have.

lntm: i've been thinking of getting one...

[here, please keep in mind that i have my ipod on STILL. i am not budging an inch for this woman. incidentally, she is not budging an inch for me either and is determined to take up more than her seat.]

b: you should, it's totally worth it.

lntm: i don't know.

b: really, it's great.

lntm: i bet. my husband got me an ipod, and it's my favorite thing he's gotten me ever. i work at [wherever], you know, in a lab, and whenever people around me are talking and i want to do work, i just put it on!

um, oh. so then YOU KNOW what an ipod is for. i mean, what? i was literally trying to sleep.

i judged someone i just met for using "literally" inappropriately the other night. don't judge me.

i'm watching friends, the one where rachel eats all the spicy food to try to induce labor. i got really excited that she was eating tapatio, my favorite hot sauce. and then i realized that a) i notice what kind of foods fictional characters are eating, and b) i can recognize a tapatio label on a tiny computer dvd player screen. i'm quirky.